Go broke

Here is a rubbish drawing illustrating a large percentage of my Christmas gifts.

Randomly, I just "camwhored" for my bff's article and good god you would think it would be an easy thing to do but camwhoring really requires skills.

I feel damn ugly.
I look like a donkey butt.
I don't understand how anyone could like me.
Now I feel sad.

Okay yes so.
Christmas this year wasn't as depressing as I had anticipated it to be because of a certain aquatic life form's involvement in my existence. She's really really pretty, here's a picture:

I KNOW, RIGHT?

While this is supposedly me:

☟

Enormous and covered in lumpy barnacles. Albeit slightly majestic. But that's just the effects of my l33t photoshop skills. Without it, I merely look like this:

No shit, brah.

I am the love child between a Blobfish and a Humpback Whale.

...

Also, I really need someone to take good care of my money for me because I spend like a millionaire but am nowhere near that financial capacity. According to Banny ban ban,

Should I intentionally nurse a deeper and closer relationship with my younger sister because she is a Cancerian and therefore can be trusted with handling monetary aspects of my life? Am I a crazy horoscope freak for actually considering this? Does everyone around me judge me already? Is my life doomed to perpetual seemingly baseless horoscope-driven decisions?

NO.

I FERVENTLY REFUSE TO GO DOWN THAT ROAD.

>:

Alright maybe a little.

But only because this horoscope forecast kiiiiiiiiiinda sorrrrrrta corresponds with my life. Specifically in the area of my spending.